Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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