True but thats because hes a fetus.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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