I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize