Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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