i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize