I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
