Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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