Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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