I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize