big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
