Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I think I just sharted jello shots
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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