What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
