mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
