dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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