Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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