You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
