i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
