High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
