So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
