yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Randomize
