It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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