and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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