69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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