People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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