Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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