hotel room ftw
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
what day is it and did you see me today?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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