If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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