forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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