So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
