Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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