Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Randomize
