just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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