Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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