Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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