I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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