so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
