dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
