Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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