legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
