Your dad touched me again.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
