Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Randomize