My pussy is not your playground.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
