I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
