what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
