how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
