Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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