yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Randomize
