Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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