When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
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