Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
