PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
