either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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